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Anna Ford arrested for tampering with Angela Merkel's thong collection.
Helmut Kohl said to be DISTRAUGHT.
OT: Gladys MINGE
And Mavis GUSSETBUCKET
It's been too long, it's been too long...
Anna Ford arrested for tampering with Angela Merkel's thong collection.
Helmut Kohl said to be DISTRAUGHT.
OT: Moira Stewart's fannylips declared EIGHTH WONDER OF THE WORLD
It's been too long, it's been too long...
NAR: Vanessa Feltz to release album of duets with GEORGE FORMBY
Christmas stockings reported to be not remotely bothered by impending STUFFING
That is cause THIS year's christmas favourite is BANANARAMA BREAD
It's been too long, it's been too long...
Vanessa Feltz rumoured to be working on the launch of the FABULOUS FELTZ FLAN range in order to compete with soaring sales of Bananarama Bread.
Sainsbury's reported to have SHUT DOWN their chain of stores in response.
Atomic Kitten comeback delayed as post-pregnant stars are forced into crash diets
It's been too long, it's been too long...
Also tonight: Vanessa Feltz, 82, reported to be "critical but stable" after emergency surgery to remove a large plant pot from her skull.
"Everyone knows that plant pots should be administered from the back of the head, rather than straight down over the forehead", said the digruntled Nurse on duty.
Priscilla PUBES
And oh...
Oh HOW MANY YEARS
Is it NOW Maurice?
Nina Nannar knits knickers in Neasdon
Please buy my stuff, I do crazy bag discount
NAR: Geri Halliwell reacts strongly to press suggestions that she lied about her age when in the Spice Girls
It's been too long, it's been too long...
news: Nancy SPUNGEN
OT: I've been to NICE
And the isle of GREECE
And I've sipped champagne on a YACHT
It's been too long, it's been too long...
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