Dinlo Did Eurovision 2000

[Dinlo]

Ladies and gentlemen, please put your patschehands together!

I really BLITZED this one . No Diddy-style SLACKING for me.

Right, ESC 2000. I first listened to the songs in recorded form in alphabetical order of country (). I have to say, at first I was quite underwhelmed. When you've listened to nearly a dozen songs and Wadda Hadda Dudde Da is one of the best, things aren't going well. But then how it improved

Seeing the actual show really elevated this contest for me from 'rather good' to 'genuinely spectacular'. I cannot believe what a change Eurovision went through from 98 to 2000, it really is quite remarkable. I love the staging especially the fantastic use of COLOUR. Those lit-up blocks were so simple but worked an absolute treat, it was like each act had a different stage. Special mention to France, Germany, Estonia and Cyprus for wonderful use of the colours red, yellow, green and blue respectively. The Swedes basically defined Eurovision as it looks today, so very well done to them. It makes me extra excited to see what they will come up with in 2013.

Songs-wise, there's only one song I dislike which is very impressive. It's certainly up there with 1998 in terms of quality, and maybe even surpasses it. It's made ranking the songs a real BITCH to do, because they're (almost) all good.

As ever, I noted my first impressions of the recordings, and then my final opinions of the performances, with plenty of listening in between. I think there MAY or MAY NOT be a few side-eyes at certain top 5 decisions .

[Diddy]

No Diddy-style SLACKING for me

WHAT IS THIS SHIT

[RobotBoy]

Envie De Vivre FTW!

[RobotBoy]

Glad you liked it though Dinlo, it's a spectacular year for me.

[Dinlo]

WHAT IS THIS SHIT

I knew you'd sniff out an insult! Have YOU done 3 years in 6 weeks?

[Dinlo]

Glad you liked it though Dinlo, it's a spectacular year for me.

That really is the best word for it. What a SHOW!

I do fear you MAY NOT AGREE with some of the rankings though

[RobotBoy]

I knew you'd sniff out an insult!

[Diddy]

I knew you'd sniff out an insult! Have YOU done 3 years in 6 weeks?

I like to be THOROUGH

[Dinlo]

I like to be THOROUGH

Didz, competitions have been organized, recorded, performed and won quicker than you've got through some years! I can't wait til we cross over so we can both get the REFERENCES.

[Diddy]

Didz, competitions have been organized, recorded, performed and won quicker than you've got through some years! I can't wait til we cross over so we can both get the REFERENCES.

Not sure how you arrived at THAT. I only started looking back in 2009, and it's been at my LEISURE since then. Why pop them out so quickly?

Anyway we DIGRESS

2004 SPOILER (I'm doing it now) Sakis Rouvas turns out to James Fox's father and cuts his arm off with a light-sabre.

[Kalabaliken]

2000 was really the first year Eurovision went BIG, I think, with the Audience really being part of the show. It's a GOOD year for me, not my favourite, but better than the year that followed anyway...

[Dinlo]

24. Finland: A Little Bit - Nina Åström

Place in Final: 18=


First Impressions:
I don't like her voice from the first line. I think it's because it reminds me of Jill Johnson . This is very country, and I'm not sure that's a good thing. I like the listing of various European countries/cities – it's very Scooch. I'm just not really feeling this. The key change feels like it comes too soon.

The Live Perf:
Ugh. I've decided this is the only song I don't like this year. She looks like she's singing to a particularly slow-witted toddler. No, not for me thank you.

[RobotBoy]

She looks like she's singing to a particularly slow-witted toddler.

HA! I've always thought it looked like she was singing at a nursery school or something.

Awful unambitious, unimaginative staging too. And that HAIR.

[Dinlo]

Not sure how you arrived at THAT. I only started looking back in 2009, and it's been at my LEISURE since then. Why pop them out so quickly?

Anyway we DIGRESS

2004 SPOILER (I'm doing it now) Sakis Rouvas turns out to James Fox's father and cuts his arm off with a light-sabre.

I'm not criticizing Didz, I just like us to both be able to compare and contrast so we can share the fun.

I have no idea who either of those people you mentioned are. (see, references!)

If we're doing spoilers then you should know Goran Karan once went to a dinner party with Ines and Sofia Mestari. It was hosted by the non- Rounder Girl who served placenta. Goran tried some to be polite, but Ines was still feeling a bit vulnerable after one of Claudette Pace's curries and shat herself in the hot tub.

[Dinlo]

HA! I've always thought it looked like she was singing at a nursery school or something.

Awful unambitious, unimaginative staging too. And that HAIR.

I'm glad you're on board so far RB, although it'll be more harrowing when I eventually lose you completely

[Dinlo]

23. Ireland: Millenium of Love - Eamonn Toal

Place in Final: 6


First Impressions:
Ugh at that title. Oh the lyrics are worse . I'm hating this . Much like Karleken Ar and Da Da Dum, this sort of 'let's all hold hands and love each other' thing brings out the hateful old git in me. I can't really be objective with this type of thing, I'm afraid. If it was performed by a trio of Maltese bitches in the latest Tammy Girl disco range and accompanied by a cheapo tinny pop backing track, then I COULD, but as things stand, I CAN'T.

The Live Perf:
People had mullets in 2000? The lyrics to this are ATROCIOUS, but I do like how rousing it gets. I think Nathalie Sorce's people should have got hold of those backing singers. If this was a foreign language entry I'd probably be all over it, but since I can understand how ridiculously TRITE it is, I'm not. Nice tune, terrible lyrics.

[RobotBoy]

People had mullets in 2000?

He's Irish, remember.

I think Nathalie Sorce's people should have got hold of those backing singers.

You don't mess with perfection.

[Dinlo]

22. Turkey: Yorgunum Anla - Pınar Ayhan & The SOS

Place in Final: 10


First Impressions:
I'm hoping for some belly-dancing after last year. Well this is very... Italian? Spanish? French? It's not really screaming 'Turkey' at me, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Oh a chanty chorus! Well-played Turkey, you know what you do best. It's not as brooding as Don Artik, though. I predict this will have flamenco dancing. Or Tango.

The Live Perf:
This is the song I forget the most. It's always enjoyable when I hear it, but ask me to hum it 5 minutes later and I'm at a loss. An English bit, how nice. This is good, just too forgettable in a way Don Artik wasn't. I don't know how this did so well, I defy anyone to remember how it goes after 10 minutes.

[Dinlo]

You don't mess with perfection.

[Dinlo]

21. Switzerland: La Vita Cos'è? - Jane Bogaert

Place in Final: 20


First Impressions:
Best make the most of some Italian while I can. Yeah, this is a non-event right up until the chorus, which is giving me massive Power of Love vibes. I like the chorus (well you can't go too far wrong with a bit of Jennifer Rush), but the rest of the song doesn't really exist for me.

The Live Perf:
She's having a hard time with those low notes. The verses are too long and nothingy, but I like the chorus. It's all quite old-fashioned. I bet it would have done much better ten years earlier.

[RobotBoy]

I've not watched that Jane Bogaert performance in a long time and I think she's actually pre-surgery Angelica Agurbash.

[Dinlo]

20. Spain: Colgado de un sueño - Serafín Zubiri

Place in Final: 18=


First Impressions:
Well it certainly sounds SPANISH (OT: I miss Portugal this year ). Well it's moody. The chorus is confusing me, I can't tell if it's more happy or angry. I'm going to have to see his face I think. It's tonally MIXED, which I don't know if I can deal with seeing as I like my Eurovision songs to concentrate on one simple emotion, like JOY (Sweden 99), DESPERATION (Slovenia 98) or SENILE DEMENTIA-INDUCED FUCKERY (Russia 12).

The Live Perf:
Well I like this now more than I did. OMG it's 2 to Go It sounds like the sort of thing you'd hear in the early hours of an 80's based local radio station. I don't mind this, but that's not exactly a ringing endorsement.There's plenty better this year.

[RobotBoy]

Oooh.

I'm quite enjoying this.

[Dinlo]

19. Romania: The Moon - Taxi

Place in Final: 17


First Impressions:
Pan pipes alert! He has an unusual voice. I think that was the chorus that just passed? He sounded like an injured puppy at the end. I don't know, it's a bit nasal. Oh not an electric guitar solo, there's never any need for one of those. It all seems to have picked up now as we near the end. I don't know, there's the making of a decent song here but I don't think it quite gets there. Take out the whining and we'd be a lot closer.

The Live Perf:
Well this isn't QUITE as nasal as the recording, which is a major plus. This is such a frustrating song, because with a less nasal delivery and cutting out the guitar solo and the whiny bits (so not much then ) this could have been quite LOVELY. It just misses the mark, though, which is a shame because the fast chorus bits and the strings are wonderful.

[Dinlo]

Oooh.

I'm quite enjoying this.

I wish people wouldn't hide their talant behind such ridiculously high production values. Actually that's not bad. Probably better than her Eurovision entry

[Dinlo]

18. Belgium: Envie De Vivre - Nathalie Sorce

Place in Final: 24


First Impressions:
Oh lovely, some gospel. Not for long, though. Ths is such an unusual sounding song. Is it pop? Is it gospel? Is it dance? No it's BELGIUM! It's like the platypus of eurovision entries, I wouldn't believe it existed if I hadn't heard it with my own ears. I quite like the title bits, they're the most catchy parts.

The Live Perf:
I was hoping she'd look like Whoopi Goldberg and have some nuns with her, but alas. What IS she doing with her hand? Oh poor Nathalie, she seems like quite a nice lady as well at the end there. Don't thank them, love, they're going to stab you in the back with last place . They really should have ramped up the volume of the backing singers, made it a bit more gospel. The choruses are very rousing, but the rest is bit messy.

If my torso is found in a suitcase and/or river tomorrow, please let the appropriate authorities know it was RB.

[Dinlo]

Right that's it for tonight, I shall resume tomorrow (if I survive the night).

[Win_the_game]

Turkey, Switzerland and Romania all far to low for my liking.

[RobotBoy]

CUNT!

[RobotBoy]

(if I survive the night).

You won't.

[Dinlo]

Turkey, Switzerland and Romania all far to low for my liking.

WTG, I think we established during the 2012 competition that our Eurovision tastes are quite DIVERGENT If you like one of my top 6, I shall consider it a success!

CUNT!

Who let Shirley Phelps-Roper hack into RB's account?

You won't.

[RobotBoy]

I so wish I was Nathalie Souce's publicist.

[Dinlo]

17. France: On Aura Le Ciel - Sofia Mestari

Place in Final: 23


First Impressions:
I'm slowly coming to dread French entries. Oh I like the guitar at the beginning, so that's a good start. Actually I'm quite enjoying this. It's got a nice melody, nothing amazing but certainly pleasant on first listen. Her lower register certainly makes a nice departure from last year's shriek-fest. That said, I would prefer a bit more OOMPH from it towards the end. But I like it.

The Live Perf:
This is NICE, although I have found it harder to remember than almost any other song this year [Edit - somewhat ironically, since writing this I've had this song stuck in my head on a constant loop. Damn you Eurovision gods!]. It's easy on the ears, but it doesn't really stand out. I can see why it finished so low, it's just not that memorable. Still, a major improvement on last year's French entry. Perhaps if she had a costume change mid-song, this would finish higher up.

[Dinlo]

16. Austria: All To You - The Rounder Girls

Place in Final: 14


First Impressions:
This has quite a sixties vibe. Harmonies . It's not really picking up enough for me. The chorus should have more OOMPH than it does. The key-change is picking things up more, though. The song should have started like this and gone up from there. The have nice voices but I want more hysterics. Ooh-oohooh-ooooh!

The Live Perf:
Voices With Soul NEVER DIED. The gap-toothed bitch is obviously the star. Any other other year this would probably be my favourite girl-group, but this year there's STRONG competition . It's a good song, but it never really ramps things up enough for me.

[Dinlo]

15. UK: Don't Play That Song Again - Nicki French

Place in Final: 16


First Impressions:
Ugh, here we go. The start of the Great British Decline. It's not actually AS bad as I remembered, but let's be real, it's not even in the same time-zone as Precious or Imaani. Also the title is just asking for a snide comment, but I'll resist.

The Live Perf:
She was 35? ! I'm sure that's a mistake and she was actually born in 1935. Yeah, that makes more sense. I'm going with that. She looks like Angela Merkel after a particularly traumatic stomach bug. It's very old fashioned, but then again that worked for Sweden the year before. Nicki at least gives it a go. I suppose I'm just biased against this song becuase of what it represents for British Eurovision entries. It's not BAD, I just can't warm to it.

[Dinlo]

I just had to get N*cki Fr*nch out of the way. Everything else is GREAT.

[Madison]

I see your game and I'm not fooling for it.

Let's go back to "Envie de vivre"

[Dinlo]

I see your game and I'm not fooling for it.

Let's go back to "Envie de vivre"

It's just not as good as it COULD have been with a full black gospel choir, a black Jesus and a few flaming crosses.

[Dinlo]

14. Israel: Sameyakh - PingPong

Place in Final: 22


First Impressions:
Just for context, note that I have just been listening to Ireland before this. The key change in the chorus is my EVERYTHING. Oooh-oooh, OOOOOOH-OOOOOOH, SAMEYAKH! This is brilliant. Okay, it's just finished, and I feel like I've just had an EXPERIENCE that I'm not quite able to verbalise. *puts on repeat*

The Live Perf:
Oh it's English now! Even better! The soulless, dead-eyed delivery of this song really brings out the irony. OMG was that Eurovision's first (and I presume only) gay kiss on-stage? Filth! The red-head is amazing, she's really taking it down to new depths. What's the country whose flag they're waving at the end? I can only assume said country must have delared war on Israel soon after. Oh, is it Palestine? Don't worry loves, ignore the shooting and BE HAPPY. I've looked up the lyrics to this song and they live up to my expectations, with lyrics such as 'I want a cucumber' and ' I want to do it with [my boyfriend] all day'. I know we can all get on board with sentiments like those. Truly a staggering preformance.

[Penelope]

There's another gay kiss to come in the decade, and it's NOT a fan fave