Discussion in 'Olympics' started by Madison, Aug 21, 2016.
1. Fire John Inverdale
2. Ban the Americans.
3. Drop the Football
4. Fewer medals in swimming that can be won by the same person.
5. All competitors in the Cycling Road Race carry a sword and shield
6. A comedy sound effect to be played whenever someone botches a dive.
7. Introduce a new sport for non-binary people to participate in.
8. Landmines in any field sports.
9. All Equestrian events to be like the Modern Pentatholon with a horse lottery.
10. All competitors in the modern pentathlon to perform all events shirtless/topless
11. The men to play Beach Volleyball in just their pants, to even it out.
12. All cyclists to compete in traditional islamic dress, with bicycle clips banned.
13. Brazilians shouldn't be involved in the ticket marketing strategy
14. Interpretative Dressage to Kylie hits.
15. Shirtless greco-roman wrestling, weightlifting, canoe sprint, boxing and rowing.
16. Male boxers to fuck, instead of boxing, for gold
17. Petra Mede to present for the BBC
18. Ireland's O'Donovan brothers to do all commentary on events.
19. All national anthems to be sung by Sonia, live.
20. Introduce eliminations to long distance running, like they have in the omnium.
21. Atlaspheres to be introduced as an Olympic sport
22. (I read this somewhere - maybe Moopy - but can't remember where) All events should feature a completely average man off the street as a control comparison.
23. Ryan Lochte to apologise onscreen
24. Gymnasts to wear tighter shorts
25. The Olympics should only be performed to BST time schedules, no matter where in the world they are actually held.
26. Long jumpers to be given points for the best sand sculptures they can create after they land.
27. Know what to do with the facilities AFTER the games are over.
28. Bring back the art competition.
29. All gender restrictions lifted. Men and women compete against each other as equals in all events and only the best get medals.
30. Amateur lesbian lip synching
Think that was Bill Murray. (Or a quote that he apropiated )
31. While we're at it, remove all weight classes from any sports that have them.
32. Mario and Luigi to be the official mascots for Tokyo 2020
33. More obese people
Instead of horse dancing, how about small people riding fat people and getting them to dance to Donna Summer?
PETA would approve.
Or mobility scooter assault courses.
I bet he shouted YEEEHAAA
34. Mario and Sonic to also take on the Paralympics
35. Competitors in all pool events must don the burkini
36. To ensure impartiality, all competitors must wear masks and are to be identified by a number only.
The names and nationalities of all medallists will be revealed in a pdf file published online six months after the closing ceremony, after drug testing is complete.