Jessie J - Real Deal

Discussion in 'Pop Toilet' started by Mugatu, Aug 21, 2017.

  1. Gangsta Nancy Lam

    Gangsta Nancy Lam mess

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    C4 is investigating whether Cambridge Analytica tampered with the vote AS WE SPEAK.
     
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  2. Mugatu

    Mugatu 25. he/him. poly.

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    The J stands for JINPING :oi:

    I'm weirdly pleased for her, hopefully she'll stay there and bellow Fun for Asia karaoke standards for the rest of her days.
     
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  3. Penelope

    Penelope AND SHAVE OUR EYEBROWS

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    Someone SEND RITA ORA THERE THIS INSTANT!
     
  4. Ag

    Ag User

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    How comes the media only got hold of this, FOUR DAYS after it happened?
     
  5. lolly

    lolly Rowena? From Kuwait?

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    COB did above. We're all just too shame faced and embarrassed that we denied such global talant to comment.
     
  6. SDF

    SDF The Wait is Over

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    I have no idea if there’s only one channel in China, but apparently a billion people watched this :o
     
  7. Jark

    Jark User

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    :D imagine the size of her ego right now.
     
  8. Slave

    Slave User

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    11 million people watched Michelle McManus win Pop Idol 2.
     
  9. Mats

    Mats User

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    the Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution marches on :210:
     
  10. Suedey

    Suedey HELL-ON.

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    All This Time destroys Jessie J’s entire discography.
     
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  11. Diddy

    Diddy Rice Queen

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    Is this why North Korea wants to reconcile with South Korea? They just can’t deal with China after what they did
     
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  12. Win_the_game

    Win_the_game Heroine

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    You weren't wrong. She's finally got round to serving us this TREAT.

    *Strangles self with beige chiffon*
     
    Last edited: May 19, 2018
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  13. SDF

    SDF The Wait is Over

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    Mark it in your diaries loves, she’s releasing her album across this week:

    R.EALISATIONS (EP out 05/22/2018)
    1. Oh Lord (Interlude)
    2. Think About That
    3. Dopamine
    4. Easy On Me

    O.BSESSIONS (EP out 05/23/2018)
    1. Real Deal
    2. Pretty
    3. Not My Ex
    4. Four Letter Word

    S.EX (EP out 05/24/2018)
    1. Queen
    2. One Night Lover
    3. Dangerous
    4. Play

    E.MPOWERMENT (EP out 05/25/2018)
    1. Glory
    2. Rose Challenge (Interlude)
    3. Someone's Lady
    4. I Believe In Love
     
  14. Suomi

    Suomi Super Moderator

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    Oh for fuck’s sake
     
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  15. Mugatu

    Mugatu 25. he/him. poly.

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    cunt

    I know that Jessie is a struggling artiste and victim of bisexual conversion therapy but making your tens of fans (not including the entire nation of China) buy four incredibly shit EPs when they've already heard most of the songs on the album is a bold move.
     
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  16. Win_the_game

    Win_the_game Heroine

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    And including two interludes so you're only really getting 10 'songs' for money.

    Edit: Oh it's 14 actually. I can't count. They'll still be self-indulgent shite though.
     
  17. Pipo

    Pipo Gossip is the devil’s telephone, best to hang up!

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    she better not be releasing them in physical format though, POOR stores don't want to waste all this space on this cunt

    I would consider forgiving her if this hot mess included at least a BOP of Domino-levels but since she's an ARTISTÉ now I doubt it.
     
  18. Jark

    Jark User

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    How can an interlude be the FIRST track? Stupid bitch
     
  19. lolly

    lolly Rowena? From Kuwait?

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    I don't think a list of song titles has ever made me feel so physically violent.
     
  20. Pipo

    Pipo Gossip is the devil’s telephone, best to hang up!

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    cause maybe you could start this AURAL journey by listening to the 2nd EP first. QUEEN OF CHOOSING YOUR OWN MUSICAL ADVENTURE.
     
  21. Suedey

    Suedey HELL-ON.

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    What a load of shit. :manson:

    Second only to LULU.
     
  22. lolly

    lolly Rowena? From Kuwait?

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    Only after a photo finish.
     
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  23. Marilyn

    Marilyn User

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    Kind of goes without saying but these EPs didn’t chart anywhere as far as I can tell
     
  24. Christian

    Christian GOOD BYE!

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    One of the songs popped up in my New Music Mix (or whatever it's called) the other day and it was dross. That's enough Ms J for the DECADE I think.

    Also, her penning a heartfelt letter to Billboard confirming her status as an LBGTQIJJ+ icon/ally/enabler/defender/leach was a bit rich given her yo-yoing in and out of the bisexuality closet when it suited her :evil:
     
  25. hoacnH4

    hoacnH4 User

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  26. Mugatu

    Mugatu 25. he/him. poly.

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    Damn, I thought this had been bumped because she'd died.

    I've taken a week off uni work for important self-care reasons, which will hopefully give me time to listen to Jessie J's self-written indie passion project and share some of my thoughts.
     
  27. Diddy

    Diddy Rice Queen

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    Nah she won’t die, unless she can’t complete her feeding ritual before the hunter’s moon
     
  28. Rita

    Rita User

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    I don’t want to click on this. What is it??
     
  29. Halli

    Halli sippin' champagne from a paper cup

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    So this has been and gone?! Did she do any promo
     
  30. Pipo

    Pipo Gossip is the devil’s telephone, best to hang up!

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    SHE WAS CHINA'S #1 SINGER

    how DARE you question her abilities
     
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  31. Mugatu

    Mugatu 25. he/him. poly.

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    Jessie J gets her tits out and compares her truly dire music to dog food in an illuminating new interview:

     
  32. Peekaboo

    Peekaboo User

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    You can tell she's really SEETHING about this, yet she still BEGS Dua Lipa for a duet in the same breath :D

    Her fans know what's up:
    Yeah I WONDER WHY :side-eye:
     
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  33. Jark

    Jark User

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    the SHAME OF IT ALL :D
     
  34. Slave

    Slave User

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    Mystic Meg had the hairstyle first.

    Fuck off Jessie J.
     
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  35. Nowoco

    Nowoco User

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    I dont even know where to start with that IG post o_O O_o o.O O.o
     
  36. Ag

    Ag User

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    What are you talking about?
     
  37. KindaCool

    KindaCool KayCee

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    That might just be the cringiest thing ever.

    Does Dua Lipa just not like her?
     
  38. Nowoco

    Nowoco User

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    I was making an observation on Jessie J's horrendous IG post up the page. What's confusing you?
     

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