So Javine ISN'T going to be the new funky? I have to say, the PR on this one has been a mess from start to finish.
I wrote this as a joke, but it turns out it's true Who will be the new funky? What qualities must he or she have?
funny that because I thought it was you who suffered the humour bypass in this thread I guess some things never change
Theresa May is singing the Olympic theme "Fist for Gold (serrer pour la gloire)". The new Home Secretary will be revealed by the end of the weekend.
Well Tulisa apparently has a toothache and may not be on X Factor this weekend oh, have I said too much?
No news on the new home secretary? Rumours on Twitter say it's Dale Winton. But I think #homosecretary may be just a gag. My money is on Mrs Goggins from Postman Pat. But if that's the case just WHO is going to run the Post Office in Greendale?
It's all true - the Mail has confirmed it. Coincidentally Greendale are now holding a referendum about opening the post office on saturdays. But who will be the next Greek Prime Minister?
I wonder who will prepare and present a list of 632 essays on bad pop singles of the 1990s now though.
If you think about logically it, you'd realise that ANY MEMBER of Clepatra can be the UN Chief 1992-1994
Zsa Zsa Gabor is supposedly considering her options, and is just looking for someone to replace her in her upcoming major surgery
I just have a feeling Boutros Boutros Ghali's replacement will be someone who isn't retired/unemployed. Someone who themselves would need replacing.
I can't believe you think Cleopatra and Frank Skinner don't have careers. I mean Mrs Goggins is over 200 years old and she still needed replacing. I think you've spent too much time with notorious ageist Mr Andie McPhee.
Her upcoming major life-saving coma-fighting surgery? I'm not sure she can be replaced - she's pretty much the key player.
You spoke too soon as Lulu replaces Zsa Zsa on the operating table. In an ADVANTAGEOUS turn of events, Dr Conrad Murray is to perform the procedure.
Madison I got your note about needing my help but I see you've held steadfast and managed to keep this important newsfeed on track. Well done you. My timing is impeccable though as I've literally just got off the phone with TMZ who informed me that Peter Jackson has been with the BBC all week about that position. Bad news for The Hobbits though... Who's going to direct them now?
The Hobbit has been updated on imdb. Lisa Scott Lee is set to direct - she's been doing film courses in Dubai. I wonder who will take LSL's place in the upcoming Steps tour.
Word is it's the supremely talented Alison Janney. Steps management saw her performance of The Jackal on The West Wing and thought it was a no brainer. Her Hollywood agency are now furiously putting together a pitch to find a new semi famous award winning character actress for small roles in about 5 cute indie movies per year. I'd apply myself but I don't have an equity card.
Floella Benjamin has just been over and has mentioned that ED the DUCK is definitely in the running. But who is going to replace him in the BROOM CUPBOARD as the main tormentor of Andy Crane.
