Improptu BI~ON~IC Sync Listen Party 9pm TONIGHT

POP!

Let the light in
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To celebrate the fact that it is 10 years old TODAY and Spotify has all 23 tracks from the Deluxe available to stream. :disco:

9 pm in the UK that is.

Christina_Aguilera_-_Bionic_%28album%29.png


ANY TAKERS?
 
Let's have some chart stats, shall we?

UK: 1-29-45-71-77-98-OUT
US: 3-9-22-32-34-59-56-67-83-84-126-163-172-197-OUT

Its record chart drop from #1 was beaten by someone in 2017.
 
I'm surprised nobody brought up Not Myself Tonight in the DEFINING career songs thread :disco: If there ever was an iconic chart flop it would be this (according to dozens of internet gays).

and fuck Perez Hilton, he single-handedly helped ruin this diva all throughout 2010 :(
 
Oh god I might be up for this. :o

I'm sure I have listened all the way through at least once but I don't know the album at all.
 
I'll join because why not but GOD this album is rubbish for large chunks :D the fact that her delusional ranting about it being ahead of its time has actually convinced a significant proportion of the fanbase that it WAS (and was a REALLY GOOD ALBUM) is... quite something
 
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I can't join but if I would I'd be waxing lyrical about all SIX gold plated SULTRY GEMS, all officially certified too ahead of their time:

- Not Myself Tonight
- WOO HOO
- Lift Me Up
- You Lost Me
- Vanity (err.... :D)
- Birds Of Prey

:disco:
 
SO DAMN BIONIC

ELECTRONIC SUPERSONIC ROCKET (HEY)

The chorus is shit but the verses are really quite enjoyable - almost reminds me of Mariah's delivery on Cruise Control
 
Things start off rather well with "Bionic" -

"ARE YOU READY TO GOOOOOO?????" :disco:

"Gonna get you with my electronic, super sonic, rocket HEYYYYY!"

Her mind :disco:
 
"I am the future."

"Often imitated, never duplicated."

We love a humble queen.
 
I always feel like "Not Myself Tonight" was unfairly maligned. A bit of parody of itself but the chorus is undeniable.

This is also a serve:

"In the MOOOORNING
When I WAAAAAAAKE UP
I'll go back to the girl I used to be
But, baby, NOT TONIIIGHT!"
 
Not Myself Tonight is one of the WORST lead singles EVER :D it's not even about whether it's a good song - it was just such a HORRIBLY misconceived comeback vehicle for her. I remember seeing the single cover before the song premiered and having high hopes, and then it all disintegrating spectacularly when we actually heard it. Probably if you rake up the thread from the time I'd be all over it, but in reality I knew she was fucked.
 
I always feel like "Not Myself Tonight" was unfairly maligned. A bit of parody of itself but the chorus is undeniable.

This is also a serve:

"In the MOOOORNING
When I WAAAAAAAKE UP
I'll go back to the girl I used to be
But, baby, NOT TONIIIGHT!"

It's a CAMP CLASSIC.

Woohoo is just bad.
 
I have absolutely no notion of whether Woohoo is actually a good song. I think in many ways it's better than Not Myself Tonight, and might've been a bolder comeback statement. Nicki's verse is a total serve.

I absolutely do know that this song has no business being 5 and a half minutes long :D
 
Yeah "woohoo" hasn't aged well (shocking). Even peak Nicki Minaj couldn't make it a hit :D
 
"Licky licky yum yum" and "you don't even need a plate, just your face, HA!" are both iconic lyrics though.
 
"such a... SPASTIC LOVE..." :disco:

"a rubber band WAS an analogy
YOU can even SAY it's a METAPHOR" :disco:

"If we were GAFFA TAPED maybe we could spend the SUM-MERRRRR" :D

I actually cannot believe this song exists. but it's a fucking banger! Who is she aping vocally on the verses? That deliberate borderline off-key delivery. I can't work it out. It's the same dialect she uses on Bionic (the track).
 
I remember reading that 5G truther M.I.A was excited to write a track for a diva vocalist, only to discover Xtina just wanted to do an M.I.A impression.

"spastic love" :goodgrief:

Otherwise its a banger.
 
It's not a great sign when the only ascertainable lyric in the chorus is "such a SPASTIC LOVE" but I'm sonically interested in this.
 
"such a... SPASTIC LOVE..." :disco:

"a rubber band WAS an analogy
YOU can even SAY it's a METAPHOR" :disco:

"If we were GAFFA TAPED maybe we could spend the SUM-MERRRRR" :D

I actually cannot believe this song exists. but it's a fucking banger! Who is she aping vocally on the verses? That deliberate borderline off-key delivery. I can't work it out. It's the same dialect she uses on Bionic (the track).
It kind of has a Ladyhawke feel to me.
 
oh yeah it's M.I.A. Of course. It's a bit shameless but she does it WELL

"Desnudate" is where this album begins to GO SOUTH - wholly nondescript, dated and disjointed. Very Blackout but make it (slightly) Spanish.
 
I had forgotten Desnudate existed. Impressive considering I was an XTINA STAN. I think this one must have been deleted from my iTunes library.
 
I don't remember "Glam" , it sounds like her budget with this album is incrementally shrinking with each song :D
 
She was clearly aiming for Vogue 2.0 with Glam, but landed somewhere closer to the Sex and the City 2 soundtrack.
 
Morning Dessert? Sex for Breakfast? Think I'll stick to the Frosties.
 

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