Improptu BI~ON~IC Sync Listen Party 9pm TONIGHT

I would be down to do one of these for Liberation at some point. Obviously my ears cannot handle a "Lotus" sesh.

Perhaps next week. I would enjoy a Lotus re-visit too. If memory serves, I prefer it to the other 2010s albums. It was very poorly mastered though (if that's what it is).
 
Decided I couldn't be bothered with this tonight. Gonna have a X-Tina post 2010 marathon in the background of work tomorrow instead. Never listened to Lotus or Liberation so can only assume I'm in for A TREAT :eyes:
 
She was really very skinny when she shot Burlesque and started promoting Lotus - didn't she begin yoyo-ing dramatically almost the moment You Lost Me was out? I wonder if that had something to do with her state of mind with the marriage breakdown, reaction to the album etc.

Still popstars have endured FAR ROUGHER low points in such circumstances so I suppose the weight thing was a bit of a lucky escape. She's always struck me as having quite a strong grip on her own mental health, presumably because she's such a raging narcissist. :disco:
 
Bionic RATE

08 Bionic
09 Not Myself Tonight
05 Woohoo
08 Elastic Love
02 Desnudate
02 Glam
00 Prima Donna
06 Sex for Breakfast
10 Lift Me Up
07 All I Need
08 I Am
10 You Lost Me
03 I Hate Boys
03 My Girls
00 Vanity

09 Monday Morning
01 Bobblehead
08 Birds of Prey
05 Stronger Than Ever
07 Little Dreamer

So half is truly diabolical, and the other half is a mix between satisfactory and career bests. It will probably be another decade before I commit to another full album listen.
 
She was really very skinny when she shot Burlesque and started promoting Lotus - didn't she begin yoyo-ing dramatically almost the moment You Lost Me was out? I wonder if that had something to do with her state of mind with the marriage breakdown, reaction to the album etc.

Still popstars have endured FAR ROUGHER low points in such circumstances so I suppose the weight thing was a bit of a lucky escape. She's always struck me as having quite a strong grip on her own mental health, presumably because she's such a raging narcissist. :disco:
She was very thin for both singles ("You Lost Me" followed within a month of the album anyway) but started to get curvier when it came time to promote Burlesque but was still health looking through late 2010.

christina_aguilera_at_burlesque_los_angeles_premiere_green_strapless_dress_..jpg


She only blew up in 2011 when she started promoting The Voice.
 
:D

same though! This was fun! I stan her forever despite (or because of) the mess.
I think the album stands out because every other young pop diva was at their peak and gave us phenomenal albums that year (Teenage Dream, The Fame Monster, Loud...) but X-Tina only gave it 20%. I do wonder how it would have fared if it came out a bit more ahead of the curve, like in 2008 when she released "Keeps Gettin Better" which would have fit right in this album.
 
Bionic RATE

08 Bionic
09 Not Myself Tonight
05 Woohoo
08 Elastic Love
02 Desnudate
02 Glam
00 Prima Donna
06 Sex for Breakfast
10 Lift Me Up
07 All I Need
08 I Am
10 You Lost Me
03 I Hate Boys
03 My Girls
00 Vanity

09 Monday Morning
01 Bobblehead
08 Birds of Prey
05 Stronger Than Ever
07 Little Dreamer

So half is truly diabolical, and the other half is a mix between satisfactory and career bests. It will probably be another decade before I commit to another full album listen.
Woohoo, Desnudate, Prima Donna and Vanity are all 10’s.:disco: If you don’t like these cheap trashy bops (and make no mistake, they are garbage) no wonder you don’t like the album. So glad her label forced her to work with Polow da Don so she could give us this mess. Too bad we never got to hear that Dr Puke song she recorded as well.
 
WHAT? where? SAY! HAH! this is news to me :disco:
I bet the result would have been awful, her talent surpasses Dr. Luke's gimmicks.
It was a song called "So What You Got" co-written with Cathy Dennis.:disco: It was registered on ASCAP or some SHIT.
 
09 Bionic
11 Not Myself Tonight
09 Woohoo
08 Elastic Love
05 Desnudate
00 Glam
00 Prima Donna
05 Sex for Breakfast
10 Lift Me Up
07 All I Need
10 I Am
10 You Lost Me
05 I Hate Boys
07 My Girls
05 Vanity

09 Monday Morning
00 Bobblehead
08 Birds of Prey
06 Stronger Than Ever
08 Little Dreamer


Ha.

WHAT!
 
I've just stuck this on for my own little private re-listen and think there must be something wrong with my version. All I can hear is an awful noise. :zombie::zombie:
Critiquing? During our Bi-ON-ICK relisten party? Really? *dry cunty chuckle* Shoot him!
 
I made it through the LOT

Feverish HIGHS, hellish LOWS

08 Bionic
10 Not Myself Tonight
08 Woohoo
02 Elastic Love
05 Desnudate
-- Love & Glamour (Intro)
03 Glam
02 Prima Donna
-- Morning Dessert (Intro)
07 Sex for Breakfast
09 Lift Me Up
-- My Heart (Intro)
08 All I Need
06 I Am
10 You Lost Me
01 I Hate Boys
00 My Girls
04 Vanity

06 Monday Morning
00 Bobblehead
09 Birds of Prey
05 Stronger Than Ever
05 I Am (Stripped)
07 Little Dreamer
 
oh my god she's the actual worst :disco:

I still remember with great delight the sheer bafflement on the faces of about 12000 casual Dutch fans during her Amsterdam show last year every time she opened her mouth to talk, or adlibbed a random cackle. They clearly had no idea WHAT they were dealing with. The gays, of course, were loving it!
 
Where is that gif of her mistakenly calling a Voice contestant's son a beautiful daughter? :D
 
I stand behind Lift Me Up, Not Myself Tonight and especially You Lost Me as career-bests, but the rest of this album is just so utterly dreadful, I cannot even bring myself to give it another listen. ARTPOP it is NOT!
 
I stand behind Lift Me Up, Not Myself Tonight and especially You Lost Me as career-bests, but the rest of this album is just so utterly dreadful, I cannot even bring myself to give it another listen. ARTPOP it is NOT!
It's better than ArtPop!
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: GNL
The "are you ready go?" moments would have made a great interlude-intro, but the rest is the melodic equivalent to ingrown hairs. If she claimed to have written the chorus by herself I'd believe her. Unfortunately I can imagine the word "bionic" was on the scrap board of hers and her collaborator simply felt obligated to honour her.

Not Myself Tonight has all the drama a career sinker demands. That she thought she could take on and destroy Lady Gaga with this makes it one of the most extraordinarily compelling songs of all time. The video was grotesque, lurid and one of the best things I've ever seen simply because it's all just hot air propelled by the fact that she's a monster.
You Lost Me was too bleak to find the Adele-sized audience it truly deserves. It's intimate, gut wrenching and truly a landmark that
I Am both versions are gorgeous. Some of the lyrics devastate me. Some of the lyrics are hilarious. I wonder which words she added.

Vanity. It's a slog, but the fact that she's singing something that's barely above the calibre of Vanilla does illuminate it in a way that makes it sporadically very appealing.
Monday Morning. Not as good as the Shakira songs the "don't look at me that way" singers did and more's the pity. Sounding a bit like Sheryl Crow here and even more so on the lesser My Girls.

Glam. If I want this kind of trash pop I'll seek out Catwalk by Monrose.

Little Dreamer. Chasing after Rachel Stevens was a more fruitful endevour than I could have imagined. I'd loved to have seen the Ladytron faces as Madamme X starts to cunt up the vocals, but I can't fault them myself. She should have recorded Destroy Everything You Touch for shits and giggles. I really do wish whatever came from the Goldfrapp sessions would leak (I remember Alison stopping her band mate from slagging her off, so I'm guessing it was a good match).

I absolutely love Lift Me Up. As on YLM, the vocals are an outer body experience. By this point I think she was too content with her fame and status to understand how much work was required to get her back on track to have hits on her own again as the good material absolutely should have been successful.

I don't think I have it in me to even think about some of the others. I don't remember how All I Need goes - that's the one I imagine may have improved, but stripping away the "gloss" and the vile excitement and the dross is one turtle head after another.

The album is anywhere between a 5 and 8 out of 10.

For the record, I think Lotus might be her most consistent one for me, but she's more of a buried treasure artist than an album's one.
 
@straightorbroken Lotus was awful! And it bothers me to no end it all sounds like it was recorded in a soda pop can.

Perhaps some revisiting is required as well
Lotus has maybe two or three good songs (including the one with Blake Shelton, oddly enough) but the entire thing really is completely unlistenable due to the muddiness of it all. Her vocals also sounded a bit rough in quite a few places if memory serves. Your Body is a marvel though, and Red Hot Kinda Love was a fun bop.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back
Top Bottom