UK: The Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson years - problematic + infected + broke the law + electoral poison + sneks + not very good + OVER (funny)

[Kate]

True though that we have no proof - behaving like an arrogant fucking cunt might just be down to being a Tory rather than drugs.

 

[octophone]

I couldn't give a steaming cat's fanny about Gove going clubbing. I'm just glad he was in Aberdeen. Hopefully, he'll get mashed and walk into one of its many harbours, thinking he can swim to Finland and organise a trade deal there and then.

 

[COB]

What proof is there he was on coke? And who really gives a shit if he was anyway - are you seriously saying that nobody on here has ever done it?

I haven't

 

[ButterTart]

Beer shortages at Wetherspoons after Brexit and Covid hit supply chains

Pints of Carling and Coors are unavailable in some branches, with the problem due to a lack of lorry drivers.

metro.co.uk

Wetherspoons has a beer shortage.

What a shame.

Oh good. Maybe they can mulch those pro-Brexit propaganda leaflets they used to put on their tables and drink them instead.

And how the fuck has Tim Martin not been picked up by the Yewtree nonce squad yet? He clearly looks the sort and he’s a Brexiter so we know he’s a not-right.

 

[big ron]

What proof is there he was on coke? And who really gives a shit if he was anyway - are you seriously saying that nobody on here has ever done it?

Fuck off.

 

[Lucille]

We’ve had constant beer shortages at the pub for months, it’s actually a nightmare.

 

[octophone]

Bottom line: all out stuff comes on lorries. We told several thousand lorry drivers to fuck off and made the UK economically non-viable from thousands more. And straight after that, we had a pandemic which meant no-one could learn/pass their test to get an HGV licence.

We're FUCKED. Actual food shortages are here. The hospitality industry is fucked. Even the supermarkets, the one semi-resilient business in the pandemic, are fucked now. It's going to topple over as people try and prep for Xmas.

 

[ButterTart]

Bottom line: all out stuff comes on lorries. We told several thousand lorry drivers to fuck off and made the UK economically non-viable from thousands more. And straight after that, we had a pandemic which meant no-one could learn/pass their test to get an HGV licence.

We're FUCKED. Actual food shortages are here. The hospitality industry is fucked. Even the supermarkets, the one semi-resilient business in the pandemic, are fucked now. It's going to topple over as people try and prep for Xmas.

The supermarkets are already forecasting shortages for Christmas and urged people not to panic but, which means an insane amount of panic buying from the same bottom feeders who voted for this bullshit in the first place.

 

[octophone]

The supermarkets are already forecasting shortages for Christmas and urged people not to panic but, which means an insane amount of panic buying from the same bottom feeders who voted for this bullshit in the first place.

Oh, just you wait - one of the forecasts if for a 60-70% reduction in the number of turkeys available in December. It's going to be WILD.

 

[big ron]

There is something bittersweet about the 'turkeys voting for christmas' analogy and then a lack of turkeys at christmas

 

[big ron]

I'm more than happy with a nut roast.

 

[Kate]

Looking forward to my mum (who voted leave) biting her tongue when she can't find an affordable turkey rather than admitting she was wrong.

 

[lolly]

My mother voted leave. She has at least admitted she was wrong. Christ knows she has form.

 

[D5K]

I just hate the way all the labour shortages are going to be blamed on covid and NOTHING ELSE

 

[lolly]

I just hate the way all the labour shortages are going to be blamed on covid and NOTHING ELSE

They would have found something else anyway. It just would have been more fun seeing them scramble around for excuses.

 

[Sheena]

My Mum voted remain and gleefully shouts the likes of “looks at this load of bollocks, nothing on the bloody shelves, I hope you’re all happy” at no one in particular from her wheelchair when I’m pushing her around Tesco.

Couldn’t be prouder.

 

[Sheena]

And I WANT food shortages. Bring it on. I want a shit Christmas dinner, no fucker getting the presents they want and general MISERY to be heightened.

 

[Soldi]

Turkey is SHIT anyway

 

[Alex]

Turkey is SHIT anyway

Far prefer a Christmas GOOSE

 

[Kate]

Far prefer a Christmas GOOSE

Sexual or asexual?

 

[lolly]

Sexual or asexual?

I didn't realise it was either/or

 

[ZenGiraffe]

I didn't realise it was either/or

Asexual Goose inside a Sexual goose is the only way to go.

 

[lolly]

I'm perfectly happy to go for a three rodent roast instead of bird

 

[Alex]

Asexual Goose inside a Sexual goose is the only way to go.

YES

 

[dmlaw]

I'm perfectly happy to go for a three rodent roast instead of bird

But are you ready to have to strangle those rodents with the fairy lights on Christmas Eve?

 

[Kate]

I didn't realise it was either/or

Well there are demisexual geese but they don't like to be eaten until they've got to know you.

 

[.org]

Oh here comes the GAMMON BRIGADE

Oh Fuck off you thick twat.. I don't even vote Tory. Just because I'm not outraged by somebody dancing in a nightclub you make all sorts of assumptions about me... What an absolute loser.

 

[lolly]

But are you ready to have to strangle those rodents with the fairy lights on Christmas Eve?

I was thinking more of going out with a spade on Christmas Eve and scraping up festive roadkill.

 

[Soldi]

Oh Fuck off you thick twat.. I don't even vote Tory. Just because I'm not outraged by somebody dancing in a nightclub you make all sorts of assumptions about me... What an absolute loser.

Calling me a thick twat when you’ve COMPLETELY MISSED THE POINT

And well considering the amount of SHITE you post on here day in day out I’d say the jury is still very much out on whether or not you’re still a gammon/Tory/troll/ALL THREE

 

[.org]

Calling me a thick twat when you’ve COMPLETELY MISSED THE POINT

And well considering the amount of SHITE you post on here day in day out I’d say the jury is still very much out on whether or not you’re still a gammon/Tory/troll/ALL THREE

Whatevs

 

[ZenGiraffe]

Whatevs

 

[Indie]

Oh, just you wait - one of the forecasts if for a 60-70% reduction in the number of turkeys available in December. It's going to be WILD.

So rather than turkeys voting for Christmas, it's Gammons voting for a cured-pig-based Christmas alternative.

 

[D5K]

Just as well Moopy isn't falling for the "let's hope this Gove story distracts the masses from the current crisis" tactic...

 

[Indie]

Michael Gove is a twat.

Next question.

 

[big ron]

I had a business related idea today that involves baiting the tories at their conference next month for social clout and if I get it right maybe some PR. Can't wait.

 

[ButterTart]

And I WANT food shortages. Bring it on. I want a shit Christmas dinner, no fucker getting the presents they want and general MISERY to be heightened.

I'm definitely in this camp. Starve the stupid out of them.

 

[Soldi]

Is Maccies open on Christmas Day?

 

[Sheena]

Is Maccies open on Christmas Day?

NOTHING WILL BE OPEN! WE’LL ALL BE EATING RAT!

 

[GNL]

47 new hospitals and they're all HAUNTED PACER CARRIAGES.

 

[Diddy]

Wtf

they really don’t want to spend money in the north so they’re giving them old bits of trains?

look at our brand new orphanage which used to be still technically is a shipping container