What WEDNESDAY is it?

Morning, I think my friend is trying to cancel our plans today, however out of 5 messages not one has made a LICK OF SENSE. I'm presuming she's been up doing coke all night as that's the only time she messages me at 8am.
 
It’s the best kind of Wednesday, if you ask moi! The one where I’m still in bed :disco:
 
Didn't you all know that porridge is the breakfast of Kings? Especially with prunes.
 
Urgh my work laptop insisted on doing an update yesterday and now I can't access the main system I need for work :):)
 
Anyway, I get my sim card today, can't wait to get all my missed messages :eyes:
 
Fucking toaster broke. Fused the whole kitchen yesterday. That's £30 I couldn't be arsed to spend, but will hopefully show up on the Moopy Amazon funds.
 
The neighbours are DRILLING. Can't I have a lie-in on a Wednesday afternoon IN PEACE?
 
I'm quite GLUM on this tuesday-adjacent wednesday. told my straight best friend we can't move in together as planned in 3 weeks because I have feelings for him and it'll be too difficult. so it's all a bit MESSY!

living up to my REPUTATION.mp3 as a messy queen!
 
Oh I’ve been rerouted. With low priority. Even after I told him I can’t fucking work. :manson: WHERE DO THEY FIND THESE PEOPLE
 
The neighbours are DRILLING. Can't I have a lie-in on a Wednesday afternoon IN PEACE?
My neighbours are having their roof done. If I wasn't aware of the drawbacks of living in the countryside, I'd live in a house in a field.
 
I'm quite GLUM on this tuesday-adjacent wednesday. told my straight best friend we can't move in together as planned in 3 weeks because I have feelings for him and it'll be too difficult. so it's all a bit MESSY!

living up to my REPUTATION.mp3 as a messy queen!

That is hard but imagine how horrible it would be if you lived together and had to see him bring home girls!
 
That is hard but imagine how horrible it would be if you lived together and had to see him bring home girls!
well quite!

I mean he's not much of a lethario and he's basically just desperate to get the first girlfriend who'll have him, but it was likely to happen at some point!
 
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I've done SO MUCH HOUSEWORK, been out for a walk and now I'm about to cook.

I'm a fucking PERFECT HOUSE HUSBAND.
 
OK I can't stand it any longer, what does "fuck my drag" or "fuck X's drag" mean PLEASE
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