Ag reassesses MDNA

GinAg (39)

GinAg (39)

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I have a rather notoriously difficult relationship with Madonna. Obviously it's one sided for starters, however if ever there was a love/ hate artist for me, it's this bitch. As an individual I find her largely repulsive. Musically she's my third most played of all time.

By the time this came out EDM was starting to lose favour and I was an eternal stoner. As referenced elsewhere tracks like Titanium and Starships used EDM to great effect. However at this point I think I still had a bit of faith that she would drop something interesting and different. So when she released this, I almost withdrew all together. She'd jumped on a dying genre, to my ears quite badly. My housemate played it loudly all the time, which was not conducive to my stoner habits. It was the career low of career lows.

However seven years have passed and it's time to reassess.
 
Girl Gone Wild

This was central to my hate at the time. 7 years later, it does rather bang. It's hard when popped next to her past glories to praise it. As a single track, it appeals to my trashy sense of dance music, but it's unlikely to rank highly compared other of a similar genre for me. That said, I've upgraded from despicable to 'on a playlist'.

7.5/10
 
Gang Bang

I mean the name makes me sick in my mouth. Was she appear of X Factor audition classic "we're having a gang bang"?

I kinda like it, in a Skrillex parodying kinda way. But "bang bang, shot you down" is hardly an original refrain. I think her inability to present anything lyrically origin was super exposed during this era. The death threat stuff is rather desperate isn't it?

7/10
 
I hate Girl Gone Wild so much.

The room is SPINNIN'
It must BE the tanqueray
I'm a-BOUT to go astray
My inhi-BIT-shuns gon away

gross!

Celebration did EDM trash so much better.
 
I'm Addicted

Such provocative titles! Again I quite like the cheap electronic music and the song isn't half bad. I do wonder if this song would have sounded better with a less messy production. I mean it has every right to be a dance banger, just not THIS dance banger. Likewise the bang deserves a different vocal.

7/10
 
Turn Up the Radio

Quicker than a beautiful stranger! Her voice is peak annoying here. The lyrics her so fucking meaningless, it's like she's playing Madonna lyrics bingo. I mean I guess it's quite catchy, but it struggles to amount to anything up to the level of basic.

5/10
 
Ag said:
... struggles to amount to anything up to the level of basic.
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A word that pretty much sums up most of this album and really the first time in her career that she was ever 'basic'. She had been many things but basic? Never. Not until MDNA.
 
Give Me All Your Lovin'

Unfeasibly reductive. There's nothing good here. Nothing at all. Misuse of MIA and Nicki were the most basic of her problems here. No-one enjoys chanting or ZZ Top soundalikes. This stands as a career low.

0/10
 
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Some Girls

What the fuck is she rabbiting on about? I think by 2012 we all knew girls went out and got fucked. I mean we're well passed this revelation. I'm not enjoying much about this. There are some mildly not terrible electronic sequences, but they're few and far between. It all seems like such a waste. And really lyrically she is so exposed right now.

3/10
 
Superstar

I really just can't. I came here with an open mind. Ooh la la you're my superstar? For seriously though? How did this get passed demo stage? How is this under 4 minutes, it goes on for fucking ever.

2/10
 
I liked Some Girls but I imagined at the time she did it to try and reignite something in the press with Gaga because it’s very Born This Way (album) sounding. Reductive part 2 never took place.
 
I Don't Give A

I don't think many people did at this exact moment hun. Oh God rapping. Quite the change of sound. Admittedly it's not radical, but I'll take what I can get at this stage. Actually this is probably a bit of a reprieve from the garbage that proceeded it. Not quite sure why Nicki appears again. I think I'd have preferred Nicki Graeme.

4.5/10
 
I'm A Sinner

There's quite a lot of Ray of Light era rehashes on this LP, except rubbish. It's not offensive, so that's something. I kinda like it actually in a tedious kinda way.

6.5/10
 
Love Spent

And we launch straight into The Grid's Swamp Thing. Oh she's kind of changed her voice. Like she's impersonating a vocoder. Oh and a little flourish of Lay All Your Love On Me. This is probably one of the better ones for me, but that's not saying so much. It's like a quite good demo track.

7/10
 
Love Spent is a great song with some horrible mixing/mastering issues. It sounds like it was recorded over Skype from her bathroom (well...) which sums up the whole album nicely, but somewhere in there it could've been an easy 9/10 moment
 
Masterpiece

This reminds me of why I was so disappointed with 2012 Madonna. I was gagging for some Madonna ballads, something she has historically been so good at, yet seemingly shy of for the last 15 years or so. Yeah I do really quite like this. If she had real balls, she's have gone for wall to wall banger without diluting it with a ballad, however it is so so welcome.

7.5/10
 
Ag said:
I'm A Sinner

There's quite a lot of Ray of Light era rehashes on this LP, except rubbish. It's not offensive, so that's something. I kinda like it actually in a tedious kinda way.

6.5/10
Click to expand...
When I first heard this I thought, 'Great. She's made a song for Dotmusic blandies.'
 
It almost NEVER happens but the live vocals on "Love Spent" were much much better than the tinny autotuned crow on the wire nocals on the album...
 
Falling Free

It's like embarrassing mum Madonna got bored half way through and remembered she was quite good as electro Stevie Nicks. I mean it's like it's from a different album. It's nothing special or particularly bad. Obviously the most traditional Orbit sounding track.

7/10
 
I refuse to listen to the extra tracks. I'm not that into self hatred.
 
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Overall average mark = 5.33
Overall as an album = I'll be kind and round it up to a 6.
 
Obviously it's a career low. In terms of UK Eurovision acts it's like Electro Velvet and Nicki French did an album together.

At the time it was just terrible. I'm pretty ure I never listened to the whole thing.

Taken out of the timeline it's a little less bad, with some cute tracks and nice bold beats. Lyrically it's a headache. The most annoying thing, is there's a better album in there somewhere, just not what she released.
 
Ag said:
Falling Free

It's like embarrassing mum Madonna got bored half way through and remembered she was quite good as electro Stevie Nicks. I mean it's like it's from a different album. It's nothing special or particularly bad. Obviously the most traditional Orbit sounding track.

7/10
Click to expand...
GENUINELY one of my all time favourite Madonna songs. 10/10 for me.
 
Suedey said:
GENUINELY one of my all time favourite Madonna songs. 10/10 for me.
Click to expand...
I think it's very tough for me to get past the lyrics on the album to ever really love any of it. I think it was the moment when I first saw her as a bad artist. I guess that's why it's taken me the best part of a decade to properly listen to it.
 
Ag said:
I think it's very tough for me to get past the lyrics on the album to ever really love any of it. I think it was the moment when I first saw her as a bad artist. I guess that's why it's taken me the best part of a decade to properly listen to it.
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Oh it is definitely her worst album lyrically and that is NO MEAN FEAT given her post-2000 lyrics...
 
I Fucked Up is definitely the best thing about this era.

But I do have a bizarre relationship with Girl Gone Wild.
 
Take Superstar and I Don’t Give A off and replace them with Beautiful Killer and I Fucked Up then you have a 7/10 album.
 
OutSynk said:
Some Girls and I’m a Sinner are great.:oi: I love the production on both.
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Well I do QUITE LIKE I'm A Sinner. I'll a few of them a try again. It can be quite hard to assess them individually when listening to them as part of an album.
 
I'm A Sinner went down BIZARRELY well live at all 4 shows I went to.

It sounds like Robbie Williams/Guy Chambers meets Orbit/Madonna in a generic Wetherspoons in Leicester (or something like that).
 
Ag said:
Give Me All Your Lovin'

Unfeasibly reductive. There's nothing good here. Nothing at all. Misuse of MIA and Nicki were the most basic of her problems here. No-one enjoys chanting or ZZ Top soundalikes. This stands as a career low.

0/10
Click to expand...

It’s all been said before but hearing this for the first and indeed ANY time was like someone being SICK IN YOUR FACE
 
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