Diddy's hot first take

[Diddy]

I'm not bumping 40 threads with my shit, and while it feels a bit self-important to post a whole thread about this, I can't think of a better way to post my musings.

I've been VERY lax this year, I wanted to wait until the official was available before I listened to anything - but it got a bit out of hand and this week I was thinking "FUCKFUCKFUCK IT'S NEXT WEEK". So I finally sat down and watched the official video playlist in one straight shot, so here it all is. The scores are just gobbledegook though so I'm not putting them on.

 

[Diddy]

SEMI 1

Albania: Ronela Hajati - "Sekret": Ethnically dull
Latvia: Citi Zēni - "Eat Your Salad": What rotted straight grot. Is cunnilingus a feminist power move now? The song could've been good without those lyrics
Lithuania: Monika Liu - "Sentimentai": Jazzily dull
Switzerland: Marius Bear - "Boys Do Cry": Why does everyone sing drunk now? Shut it down
Slovenia: LPS - "Disko": Shrug - don't call it Disko if it's a song as boring as this
Ukraine: Kalush Orchestra - "Stefania" (Стефанія): Musically interesting but not a winner
Bulgaria: Intelligent Music Project - "Intention": How did this happen? Straights need to be stopped
Netherlands: S10 - "De diepte": Boring, dirty swimming pool too.
Moldova: Zdob și Zdub and Advahov Brothers - "Trenulețul": Not as much of a fusion as earlier entries. Folky fun but not for me
Portugal: Maro - "Saudade, saudade": Being in Portuguese doesn't make it less boring, probably makes it worse.
Croatia: Mia Dimšić - "Guilty Pleasure": Sort of nice, a bit vegetarian for me but whatever
Denmark: Reddi - "The Show": This fucking voice again, boring first half, crap second half
Austria: Lumix feat. Pia Maria - "Halo": Exciting and Dula Peepy
Iceland: Systur - "Með hækkandi sól": I wish I liked it, dreary country blah
Greece: Amanda Georgiadi Tenfjord - "Die Together": Hide & Seek is a lazy comparison but yeah. Intense but not quite amazing
Norway: Subwoolfer - "Give That Wolf a Banana": Not interesting as it thinks - to think we had Keiino a few years ago. Novelty dreck
Armenia: Rosa Linn - "Snap": Alright but boring

 

[Soldi]

Did u like anything

 

[Saltwater]

For God's sake Diddy you've killed them all and the one you didn't is getting killed by Pia Maria.

 

[OutSynk]

Albania: Ronela Hajati - "Sekret": Ethnically dull

I'm done reading.

 

[Diddy]

Did u like anything

This was definitely the rough semi - not just a shitty mood either, I watched in the Playlist order which was basically random

 

[ButterTart]

I’m glad somebody else sees what I see with Iceland and Portugal.

 

[Diddy]

OK you got me thinking maybe there was some hidden gem in Semi 1 that I didn't represent well, and ... no

My top 2 toots are probably Austria and Greece

 

[Diddy]

I’m glad somebody else sees what I see with Iceland and Portugal.

I dread to think. I imagine that's queens hoping Iceland can win, which I totally sympathise with, but not with this vegan burlap sack of shit

And queens trying to make themselves look classy by pretending they like Fado

 

[ButterTart]

I dread to think. I imagine that's queens hoping Iceland can win, which I totally sympathise with, but not with this vegan burlap sack of shit

And queens trying to make themselves look classy by pretending they like Fado

More like Fadon’t AMIRITE

 

[ButterTart]

I think Iceland and Portugal are sort of pleasant background music songs you’d hear at an unobtrusive volume in a coffee shop; they’re definitely not the sort of thing I want to hear in a competitive setting.

 

[Diddy]

SEMI 2

Finland: The Rasmus - "Jezebel": 2004 rock done right, shockingly likeable
Israel: Michael Ben David - "I.M": WHAT THE FUCK - I'm homophobic now, drag music without the drag
Serbia: Konstrakta - "In corpore sano": WTF a self-care blogger singing in Latin? I love the drama and specificity
Azerbaijan: Nadir Rustamli - "Fade to Black": Hope he gets his tits out otherwise what's the point. Sort of a melodramatic Arcade
Georgia: Circus Mircus - "Lock Me In": I love this beat. Very weird, not really doing the works on me but a lot more welcome than other novelties
Malta: Emma Muscat - "I Am What I Am": Yawn. Aggressively boring song, it is what it is
San Marino: Achille Lauro - "Stripper": I don't think that's Adrenalina in his veins. Shameless but more fun than Italy
Australia: Sheldon Riley - "Not the Same": Take that thing off your face. Overbaked and overdressed Lewis Capaldi junk, bleugh
Cyprus: Andromache - "Ela" (Έλα): Pleasant but not exciting
Ireland: Brooke - "That's Rich": Sort of a middling ASFM entry. Ireland tried to turn it this year but this isn't quite the one
North Macedonia: Andrea - "Circles": BORING AND SMELLY
Estonia: Stefan - "Hope": Like Avicii but without the good bit
Romania: WRS - "Llámame": Ooh a long lost Balkan banger, a sultry gem, outspanishes Chanel too. LOVE IT
Poland: Ochman - "River": It's good but *shrugs, nice voice but I don’t need another Arcade, unless it has Bishi Bashi
Montenegro: Vladana - "Breathe": These Balkan videos are lit. Song isn't quite there though
Belgium: Jérémie Makiese - "Miss You": Chorus quite annoying, sounded like Skyfall at the start but WTF a real dogshit after that
Sweden: Cornelia Jakobs - "Hold Me Closer": Hate that LDR vocal but when the beat drops, unnhhhh , and it ends strong. I like this
Czech Republic: We Are Domi - "Lights Off": Nice beat but hmm

 

[Diddy]

I hadn't really considered them as semi-finals because of how I listened to them, but they really are like Night and Gay, aren't they?

My toots are Sweden, Finland, Georgia, and sure let's throw Serbia in there too, she seems like a game old bird. PROTECT ROMANIA AT ALL COSTS

 

[Diddy]

AUTO FINALISTAS

United Kingdom: Sam Ryder - "Space Man": I'm shocked, it might even win, great vocal if he can handle it, doesn't go anywhere from the first chorus but I sort of live, WHAT IS HAPPENING
France: Alvan and Ahez - "Fulenn": What do you mean it isn't Georgia? Ethnobanger gets my douzes twitching, doesn't go far enough though, but holy hell what a great curveball
Spain: Chanel - "SloMo": Think it's going to be a great show, song is a bit of a generic banger. Glad Spain are back
Italy: Mahmood and Blanco - "Brividi": Boring as shit but nice tits. Is Mahmood using a vocoder? Thanks I hate it
Germany: Malik Harris - "Rockstars": This fucking voice again, boring shit, why do Germany keep shitting the bed?

 

[Saltwater]

AUTO FINALISTAS

United Kingdom: Sam Ryder - "Space Man": great vocal if he can handle it

Oh he sure can, you need to listen to him singing this live, he's even better

 

[Diddy]

I'm quite shocked at this brief flash of relevance on Moopy
check out my soundcloud and my Youtube (the second one is not a joke, fucking do it I'm dying)

 

[Diddy]

@Queen of the Bay Whose tits are in your avatar? Is that Mr Romania?!

 

[Saltwater]

@Queen of the Bay Whose tits are in your avatar? Is that Mr Romania?!

It's Stefan Airapetjan, 24 years old, 1.77m height, representing Estonia, whom you've called poor man's Avicii

 

[OutSynk]

@Queen of the Bay Whose tits are in your avatar? Is that Mr Romania?!

Take that back.

 

[Diddy]

It's Stefan Airapetjan, 24 years old, 1.77m height, representing Estonia, whom you've called poor man's Avicii

Even a poor man's Avicii would've let the beat drop. But lovely tits

 

[GNL]

Ethnically dull

Oh my 23 and me came back.

 

[Diddy]

So put me out of in to my misery - how many Moopy rabid fan favourites have I trodden on? Just so I know what to be baffled about

 

[Lucille]

Your support for Romania and Serbia obviously shows impeccable taste.

 

[Lucille]

Portugal isn’t a Moopy fave, but a lot of queens find it MAGICAL and COMPELLING, and I guess the rest are dead inside.

 

[ZenGiraffe]

Albania: Ronela Hajati - "Sekret": Ethnically dull

 

[RJN]

I should have made a thread for when Penelope made me listen to all of heat 2