Introduce yourself

Who am I? I am DS Alex Drake. I am in my early 30’s although as I have time travelled back to 1981 I am actually around 6 earth years old...but I have the voluptuous body of an adult female who in real life actually resembles a Slitheen in human form. I am now middle aged and currently tarting it up in The Bodyguard but my mind cannot escape my time travelling days spent in the much beloved early 1980’s. I am hanging up my Anne Summers bargain basement thongs and nipple tassels and happily settling down to life in my much missed, much longed for 1980’s, surrounded by my imaginary constructs and running from my highly respected lawyer father who is dressed up in a David Bowie Ashes to Ashes Clown outfit...*flips through a scrapbook of newspaper clippings of Charles and Di’s wedding*...I had to make one of those for school.

I have been most misunderstood for all of my life although those who know me now and knew me then, now understand why I was the way I was and still am. I am a mass of contradictions, complications and obsessions. I am also a voracious hater of all things social media so why am I on here. Curiosity. I liked the one in the flat cap best. I am...

Anxious (I tend to stim at times)
Sensitive (YOU NEED A HEARING AID, MATE)
Peculiar (very)
Easily distressed or as my ‘mother’ Caroline Price said ‘easily distracted’
Real literal
Gifted creatively (hell yeah)
Extremely difficult to understand (abstruse)
Resistant to change (I’m sorry but curvy Cadbury’s Dairy Milk just doesn’t work for me)
Socially challenged (people are complicated, books are not)

I also have a fridge-freezer called ‘Carrie Fridger’ who like her namesake is bi-polar but in a different way.

“Put a little sun into your cup and wow, you’ve got Pop and Pop, light up your day come alive with Pop, it’s what, it’s Pop and Pop, well, put a little, put a little, put them together it’s Pop and Pop, so goodie Pop, Pop!”

...intermission “we’ll be right back, after we go to the bathroom.”...

...POP!

My name is Alex Drake. I’ve just been shot and that bullet has sent me back to 1981. I may be one second away from life or one second away from death. They say that as you die your life flashes before you, all those memories and mistakes that form us. Well bring it on, my life can flash away as much as it likes because I’m not going to die. I’m coming back to you Lolly...oops, slip of the finger I meant, Molly.

It’s a Riddle sang Nik Kershaw...*has a delusional moment when suddenly a vision of Zippy twanging his zipper along to music by Rod, Jane and Freddy interrupts my brainwaves*

I will probably post intermittently or perhaps never again, burn the sheets, lover, BURN HER!...This isn’t you, Ed. Get control of yourself. Take control, Ed...oops...*drinks some Bollinger*

Ok, I’m not quite all there. Perhaps Cyberax has got into my head. I’m sorry but there is something I have to do. BUGS, BUGS EVERYWHERE. In my spare moments I like to pretend I am Ros Henderson.

I’m simply complicated.
 
I’m a real literal person and honest. Perhaps it’s the AUTISM. People often misunderstand people who have AUTISM. Most people with AUTISM tend to get bullied. Now I remember why I dumped Social Media which in the old days we called ‘Message Boards’. It still there, hanging in cyberspace for everyone to see. I do not have a hard enough shell to cope with social media. Real life is a constant struggle. Everyday I have to put up with Narcissistic Sociopath’s. In the years since I have had my life ruined by a vile aspect who dominated my every waking moment and still like words in cyberspace, clings like a parasite, a leech who sucks upon my existence. Reading those words again has opened up old wounds.

I am, was and always have been autistic, I just didn’t know it and neither did the people on here. The moral is, people can say what they want, pretend to be who they want, but when you reveal too much of yourself, you are vilified, fingers point and words taunt.

Perhaps I came back to say hello and maybe hoped I would be able to cope, but no. Curiosity you see. But I can’t cope with Narcissistic Socipaths and they still haunt this place. Say hello to Pop Lolly from an old friend. He’s the only one who I still think fondly of. Social Media seriously screwed up my mind...*goes back to 1981*
 
Hang on...one last final word before I exit...I still have a picture of TOYAH, but he’s probably all shrivelled up and wrinkled now. I met my real life TOYAH at work and furiously flirted with him for years, but alas the age gap and my socially awkward autistic traits proved to be my undoing and even though I proposed to him one leap year, he declined. I wouldn’t have lived with him anyway. I just wanted him to drive me around. Those who remember me, will know who I am and those who hurt me, will know who they are. I forgive you though cos you are obviously medically undiagnosed Narcissistic Sociopaths and can’t help being mentally ill. In fact you would get on very well with my ex neighbour Fat Nelly, whom like you is a Narcissistic Sociopath, although she is a millennial and you two must be pensioners by now, Ab Fab, darling, Baby Jane & Blanche Hudson, double act types, she would probably troll you if she had the chance...*runs at 1970’s bionic woman speed out of the forum*
 
I don’t think Moopy has declined at all. Clearly most of the members we have lost in the past are still lurking.
 
Jesus - of all the people I never, even thought would reappear...

Hope you're thriving Nike!
 
Oh from memory she was harmless, but reading those posts are HARD WORK.
 
Still love you, Nike. Would love to hear how you're doing.

I'm not convinced that here is the place for you, but if you want to keep in touch you can message me here or on Facebook, if you have it.

In fact I probably still have the same mobile number, if you've kept it.

x
 
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"Jane Curtin!" was the last ever post on Dotmusic, if memory serves. That's nearly 15 years ago. :nike:
 
I wouldn’t mind hearing a few anecdotes about Fat Nelly. She sounds like a treat.
 
Despite previous MULTIPLE ALTERCATIONS with Nike, I'd welcome a return.

We're all OLD and MELLOW now.
 
Hearing from Nike really has pretty much made my day :)
 
Jætike said:
Dumb question: who is Nike and what are they famous for?
Click to expand...
Nike was around in the late Dotmusic days and then in the early days of Moopy. To some she was the funniest most unique special poster we had. To others (including myself) she was vilified. She posted A LOT, often about limited subjects, which to my disgust often included detailed discussions of periods. She gave the impression of being a rather lonely individual who worked in supermarket and ate a lot of cheddar mash. She had, to her credit a very vivid imagination, her bizarre posting style was often very detailed and she used a series of quirky catchphrases *twirls*. She left when Emma and Raucous Bitch turned up and basically told her to fuck off, which she did to my relief. I'm sure others have lovelier stories about her, than I can muster.

It has of course been the best of 15 years, so she's more than welcome, in my opinion.
 
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